I’m scared to move on from my ex.
I think part of me believes that if I really let go, then it’s final. Like it confirms that it’s actually over, for real.
And what confuses me is… why does that scare me so much?
What if some people just stay with you in a certain way. What if you always miss them a little when you think about the good parts—the parts that made you fall in love in the first place. What if there’s a place in my heart that will always belong to him, even if I never go back.
I’m afraid I’ve been broken so many times that I won’t be able to love someone new the way they deserve. I gave myself so fully before. How do I do that again? What if I can’t? What if I’m ruined for good?
How does one person break another so completely? And do I really want to risk being broken again by someone new?
Even if I tried… would I be capable of being the best version of myself? Or even a better one? I don’t know.
The weight is getting easier to carry. But it doesn’t make it any less heavy.